{"id":159,"date":"2014-01-12T16:44:21","date_gmt":"2014-01-12T16:44:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/?p=159"},"modified":"2017-08-07T17:17:55","modified_gmt":"2017-08-07T16:17:55","slug":"what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/","title":{"rendered":"What Not to Say in a First Online Dating Message"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>When it comes to sending that first online dating message, it takes sometime to get to grips with what you WANT to say. By what you WANT to say we mean, what\u2019s appropriate and won\u2019t send your Mr Right hovering over the block button.<\/p>\n<p>It can be tough after all it is important not to overwhelm your potential suitor with confessions or long-winded rants but keep them interested and begging for more.<\/p>\n<p>Even if you&#8217;ve managed to get messages down to a tee, there are certain things that you simply will not want to say.<\/p>\n<p>Here are 3 basic no-nos&#8230;<\/p>\n<h3><strong>1. Don\u2019t tell him TOO much about the details of your life<\/strong>.<\/h3>\n<p> While it may be tempting to write a tell-all novel for the person that you\u2019re interested in, be deliberate about the information that you share. Every piece of information will help the other person learn more about you. Therefore, say positive, meaningful things in the beginning (or always) and help the him get a better idea of just who you are at the core. Share thoughts, jokes and your opinion on certain matters. But don\u2019t divulge too much personal information. Nobody needs to know those gory, deep intimate details before you&#8217;ve even had chance to go out for dinner.<\/p>\n<h3><strong>2. Be positive.<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p> Negative messages will not only be downers for the day, but they will ensure that you don\u2019t get past the first hurdle. After all, even if you are funny and realistic, too much negative energy will drain the living daylights out of your vibrancy. People want to feel good after they&#8217;ve read their messages not as though they&#8217;ve just watched an episode of Eastenders.<\/p>\n<h3><strong>3. Don\u2019t avoid talking about yourself.<\/h3>\n<p><\/strong> It\u2019s quite natural to be hesitant about talking all about YOU. But at some point, you\u2019ve got to let your potential date know a little more about what makes you tick. The best way to do this is to start the message off with a question and let them know what your answer would be. That way you\u2019re sharing a nugget of information whilst finding out something about him, plus it gives him a chance to ask you a question next.<\/p>\n<p>There are a whole host of considerations to contend with when two people are attempting to get to know each other online. While there are no hard and fast rules it is generally considered form to be positive, optimistic and interested, ask plenty of questions about your potential date and be realistic about your own expectations.<\/p>\n<p>Happy online dating!<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When it comes to sending that first online dating message, it takes sometime to get to grips with what you WANT to say. By what you WANT to say we mean, what\u2019s appropriate and won\u2019t send your Mr Right hovering over the block button. It can be tough after all it is important not to [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":160,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[629,635,69,5,26],"tags":[8,50,726,51,52],"class_list":["post-159","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice","category-dating","category-dating-relationship-advice","category-dating-tips","category-online-dating","tag-dating","tag-messages","tag-online-dating-advice","tag-tips","tag-what-not-to-do","country-australia","country-ireland","country-uk"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\r\n<title>What Not to Say in a First Online Dating Message - Urbansocial Dating Blog<\/title>\r\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A woman&#039;s guide of what not to say in a first online dating message. Some top tips for making the right first impression when online dating.\" \/>\r\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\r\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/\" \/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"What Not to Say in a First Online Dating Message - Urbansocial Dating Blog\" \/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"A woman&#039;s guide of what not to say in a first online dating message. Some top tips for making the right first impression when online dating.\" \/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/\" \/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Urbansocial Dating Blog\" \/>\r\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2014-01-12T16:44:21+00:00\" \/>\r\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2017-08-07T16:17:55+00:00\" \/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/67c60f6a3053d783741b96bae93a9c0e.jpg\" \/>\r\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"615\" \/>\r\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"330\" \/>\r\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\r\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Rachael Phillips\" \/>\r\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\r\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Rachael Phillips\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\r\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/\",\"name\":\"What Not to Say in a First Online Dating Message - Urbansocial Dating Blog\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/67c60f6a3053d783741b96bae93a9c0e.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2014-01-12T16:44:21+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2017-08-07T16:17:55+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/aa878ead7cfd0167591785972ecd3322\"},\"description\":\"A woman's guide of what not to say in a first online dating message. Some top tips for making the right first impression when online dating.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/67c60f6a3053d783741b96bae93a9c0e.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/67c60f6a3053d783741b96bae93a9c0e.jpg\",\"width\":615,\"height\":330},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"What Not to Say in a First Online Dating Message\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/\",\"name\":\"Urbansocial Dating Blog\",\"description\":\"Urbansocial Dating and Single Life Blog\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/aa878ead7cfd0167591785972ecd3322\",\"name\":\"Rachael Phillips\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/f75b62375ffad25b0d2b40c61566d53a?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/f75b62375ffad25b0d2b40c61566d53a?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Rachael Phillips\"},\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/author\/rachp\/\"}]}<\/script>\r\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"What Not to Say in a First Online Dating Message - Urbansocial Dating Blog","description":"A woman's guide of what not to say in a first online dating message. Some top tips for making the right first impression when online dating.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"What Not to Say in a First Online Dating Message - Urbansocial Dating Blog","og_description":"A woman's guide of what not to say in a first online dating message. Some top tips for making the right first impression when online dating.","og_url":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/","og_site_name":"Urbansocial Dating Blog","article_published_time":"2014-01-12T16:44:21+00:00","article_modified_time":"2017-08-07T16:17:55+00:00","og_image":[{"width":615,"height":330,"url":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/67c60f6a3053d783741b96bae93a9c0e.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"Rachael Phillips","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Rachael Phillips","Est. reading time":"2 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/","url":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/","name":"What Not to Say in a First Online Dating Message - Urbansocial Dating Blog","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/67c60f6a3053d783741b96bae93a9c0e.jpg","datePublished":"2014-01-12T16:44:21+00:00","dateModified":"2017-08-07T16:17:55+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/aa878ead7cfd0167591785972ecd3322"},"description":"A woman's guide of what not to say in a first online dating message. Some top tips for making the right first impression when online dating.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/67c60f6a3053d783741b96bae93a9c0e.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/67c60f6a3053d783741b96bae93a9c0e.jpg","width":615,"height":330},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/what-not-to-say-in-a-first-message\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"What Not to Say in a First Online Dating Message"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/","name":"Urbansocial Dating Blog","description":"Urbansocial Dating and Single Life Blog","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/aa878ead7cfd0167591785972ecd3322","name":"Rachael Phillips","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/f75b62375ffad25b0d2b40c61566d53a?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/f75b62375ffad25b0d2b40c61566d53a?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Rachael Phillips"},"url":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/author\/rachp\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/159"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=159"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/159\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2828,"href":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/159\/revisions\/2828"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/160"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=159"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=159"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urbansocial.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=159"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}