| Looking for | Something Else |
| Nationality | English |
| Education | University |
| Profession | Advertising/Media |
| Ethnicity | White/Caucasian |
| Religion | Agnostic |
| Orientation | Straight |
| Status | Single |
| Hair | Dark Brown |
| Eyes | Green |
| Build | Slim/Slender |
| Smoking | Smoke Socially |
| Drinking | Drink Socially |
| Star Sign | Cancer |
| Height | 5'9/175cm |
Do people ever end up the way they describe themselves in this box? What can a guy say and not live to regret, as he watches his claims fall by the wayside, one by one?:<br>They say: "I work out in the gym every morning"? I say, I'm lucky enough to not have to watch what I eat and drink, but I wish I could at least haul myself round the Common every Saturday morning.<br>They say "My teeth and hair are all my own". I say, mine too, but let's not tempt Old Father Time, eh?<br>They say: "My younger sister's mates think I'm a real catch". I say, my younger sister's mates all think I can get them into clubs / a job / the bill...<br><br>They say: "Online dating? Yeah, easy, I've done that". I say, online dating? Does it work? Does it?
| Vapour trails |
| Warm sand between my toes |
| Fry ups on a hangover |
| Furballs |
| Shortsightedness |
| That inverted commas with your fingers thing |
| Film | Royal Tenenbaums |
| Book/Author | Martin Amis |
| Album/Band | Beck - Guero (This week) |
| Holiday | Sicily |